How many times have I opened the back of a film camera that already had film in it? Countless times and I thought I've learned from every one of these experiences... but obviously I didn't. I did it again today. That feeling is indescribable. It is a mix between stupidity, self-hatred, disappointment but also it questions your ability to be able to ever learn, in fact the trust in yourself thing is a little shaky for a moment. The good thing about it? At least I still shoot film and have not given up on it! And probably never will. Maybe it is exactly because of these risks and the uncertainty of film that keeps me coming back to it over and over again. It is just not that easy if compared to a digital system. I'm not saying I'm against digital cameras, what I'm saying is that don't shoot hundreds and thousands of jpg's or RAW's, keep it within limitations. If I give myself between twenty and thirty images that I can shoot for a specific brief, I end up with better images as I spend more time on them and compose them more carefully than if I would just be shooting away and later have to go through hundreds of files finding 'the one'. This works for me, it might not for you.
Maybe I should buy red tape and every time I load a camera with film tape it closed. Or should I feel that feeling over and over again? It might stop eventually? But am I really willing to loose so many images? No.
Here an image I took on a 35mm Rollei Redbird. Unedited.
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| By Karolina Rupp Photography |
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