The Three Corners of Reality

By Karolina Rupp Photography

There are three layers to our mind, the good, the bad and the grey areas in between that influence our understanding of things and our reality. We can't escape them, they are part of us inherently.

This photograph, taken on 120 film with a medium format camera, explores exactly that concept of being caught within our own realities and that everything is subjective essentially. We are fixed in that position, and still are trying to think outside of the box and explore even more profound topics just to realise over and over again that the moment a new thought is explored it becomes a cliché. We never stop discovering things but once found, place them neatly into one of the three corners of reality. It is the restlessness of blindly searching for answers to everyday questions that freezes us in time until the hunt is over, for now, and the collection of thoughts and ideas within the mind has been expanded once again. This process continues throughout life and only ends with death, this library we carefully construct through everyday living, that helps us to survive and cope with the reality we are living (in). To draw the concept closer to the photograph, it is necessary to explain the visual elements within this image. 

Firstly, a woman is portrayed a little blurry in the just off-center of the composition with the sleeves of her jersey rolled up, ready to run and explore. Behind her head three different types of walls meet, which represent the three corners of reality by having different shades of grey as one of their properties. These walls hold her within the composition and thus shows her being stuck and caught in her own reality. On the left a door can be recognised which demonstrates the human need to escape and think differently every now and then, but also to show that it is not used (it is closed) for a reason. On the right towards the back of the composition of this photograph random objects can be seen. These show that not everything is explored within our thoughts but at the same time if you would move closer you would know what these objects are, which reinforces the concept of the cliché as mentioned above.The setting was chosen as it is a familiar structure, our reality we live in. The fear of knowing what is out there and the subjective interpretation of the latter is shown through the closed eyes of the woman. Also having to fight your way through this reality, but doing so with closed eyes (eyes are closed towards ideas and things of others because they can only be subjectively perceived and thus become one own's thoughts and ideas) plays a role within this composition. In addition, the woman is a little unsure of her position within this/ her reality which is another reason her eyes are shut as she is essentially hiding away. Through that feature, the viewer of this photograph has the ability to judge and see but the subject decides to not perceive being observed in order to protect herself, like many do within this reality.

This photograph of mine will be exhibited at the end of the year. Watch this space for more details. 

SINcere

It is interesting to note that once you believe you have found a certain theme for your blog things run smooth. But suddenly you are not sure anymore of what to write. This happened to me. These odd thoughts and things I normally bla out on here seem to have moved to a different space. Not one I chose, to be exact, I can't find it yet. But by sitting here and typing I am recalling things I wanted to share, not the wonderful ones that just scream at you but the more subtle creatures in my head. This in itself is a thought I had, the one about the creatures. 

Today I was in a conversation that triggered a thought. The discussion was a funny one, me having to, as a result of joking around, make coffee for the other person as a way to 'pay' for my "sin" I just committed (obviously the word sin was used in a funny manner which refers to me making a joke about the person I was talking to). The important part here is that if I would not know what coffee is, would that mean that I am unable to pay for my sin because I have no reference to the demand!? I know this is very far fetched and turns the humorous event into something serious, which not as some may believe is the topic of religion, but rather human interaction. To take it further, as was added by the person demanding coffee, if you don't know how to say sorry, can you be sorry? The 'how' here does not refer to a situation such as the inability to speak or a fear of the consequence of saying something and so fourth, but to truly not knowing the concept in a form of expression. To clarify, imagine you have never heard these words before: 'I'm sorry' etc, would you be able to feel sorry because you don't have a verbal connection to it? Does the association of speech with concepts make them real? And if yes (if you could feel sorry) would it be connected to the words 'I'm sorry' or would other words be used? (Obviously language plays a role I'm not going to go into here)

The point of this little exploration into space was to take something completely out of its context and question its validity through that. At the same time it also explores connections made that might or should be analysed further, here the verbal and emotional, or at least reconsidered with regards to its authenticity. Ok fair enough, it probably is and was discussed for centuries. For me though it should be taken into the arts (again), in my case photography, and explored.

I will leave this post with another thought I picked up along the way that might fit as the inverted version of the above:

"You can be sincere. But you can be sincerely wrong."

Fashion Shoot

I recently did a fashion shoot.

Here one image I'm quite happy with.
Thanks Priscilla for being such a wonderful model. 

By Karolina Rupp Photography

Mixing the Old and New

Taking images with a medium format camera on film is such a different experience within photography than your average point and click. And taking these images into Photoshop just opens up even more options. I decided to go against my usual ethic of keeping 'doctoring' to the minimum and went all out by using a photograph taken on 120 film and editing the . out of it.

Mona Hatoum

Recently visiting the Tate, I stumbled across this specific photograph by Mona Hatoum:

Mona Hatoum - Performance Still 1985

Concept thinking again it would seem. Again and again my path leads me past this concept of conceptual thinking. The concept here is to conceptualise ideas and thought into concepts that speak and talk. Concepts. 

In conceptual art the idea or concept is the most important aspect of the work. When an artist uses a conceptual form of art, it means that all of the planning and decisions are made beforehand and the execution is a perfunctory affair. The idea becomes a machine that makes the art.

This quote by John Suler illustrates exactly what I'm experiencing lately. But to take it further, does that mean images can be ugly but still attract an audience if the concept is right? I think that this is the debate here, ugly versus pretty photographs. Everyone likes pretty (pretty here is aesthetically pleasing) visuals, but is it not so much more important to also find your way to at least appreciate the ugly? 

So am I doing a good thing here?

I don't even know how to start this entry, my head feel like it is surrounded by clouds, I struggle typing fast and accurately and knowing that so much needs to be done, typed and justified, not only here. I find that for the last couple days photography became just a thing for me, and it's not a good thing. I am not seeing the beauty in it or the deeper understandings but I see it as effort, of hopeless ideas which transform into burdens. And yes I am again not inspired and after looking at ideas and images I feel that I don't appreciate them anymore, they become useless and purely skill driven, having nothing to do with thought. That was never my aim, my aim was to create art that speaks, how cliche it might sound. 

Fair enough, I didn't get enough sleep the last couple of days which might have a massive impact on all this, but I feel angry because I want to feel creative and motivated again. 

This is to much information that has nothing to do with photography but unfortunately this post will be just that. Moaning. Because sometimes we just have to moan. And no-one want's to hear it because it creates unpleasant atmospheres and feelings but maybe sometimes it must be forced to take the audience out of their comfort zone. So am I doing a good thing here?

Over-share

I'm scared, scared to write something again because it was so long ago. It's like I see this entry window where I am writing this in for the first time and it feels strange, but I can't decide who is the stranger of us two.

In the last couple of weeks I had some great and some pretty studpid ideas and thoughts and will try to give a quick run down of some of them here:

Before I start, I must say I was a little reluctant to post my ideas in such a free giving manner where everyone has access to them, and I still think it's a little silly, but I realised that today I want to inspire people and give them ideas for their own ideas.

 

Please understand that all ideas and rough drawings above are my personal work (and thus fall under my copyright) and the concepts depicted will be completed by photographing them as part of an exhibition series.  

What I'm saying is please don't steal, be inspired!!!

Keep shooting

That's the key, to keep shooting images.. not to get lazy but to remember the medium and to go on.

Today was such a day where I took the camera and tried some stuff again. Instead of thinking about concepts and ways to execute them, a simple portrait was the result of playing around with my camera... a portrait of my dear sister (visit her blog here).

Planning an exhibition

Planning an exhibition is a quite a task. But I find that by starting with a theme things might fall into place.

At the moment I am still conducting research with regards to the artists I would like to showcase who fit the theme, who would enhance the visual experience of the audience and so fourth. The theme here I won't mention yet but I will showcase a video that might underline the ideas I have. And forget the dolls, feel how you feel.






And to add to this post, a further video that has the same effect, or rather affects us in a certain way. That feeling we get when watching it is what is important!

Let us not forget...

I recently completed a project on photographing a subculture. And yes the so to say subculture I chose some might consider very incorporated into our daily lives that people see them as part of society and not as a sub part like the word subculture might imply. Where I live little shops exist that are usually run by older ladies who sell home baked goods, pickled little things and pancakes to go. They tend to be taken for granted but are vanishing as we speak because lager corporations such as supermarkets also tend to sell these "home made" goods today and because of the tricky little word "convenience" the average consumer tends to not go the extra mile (mile here refers to a distance of about 10 meters within the same centre) to buy real honest produce from a tuisnywerheid. This is sad. By choosing these ladies, or rather tannies, as my subjects I want to create awareness of the issues and problems these little shops are facing in today's mass consumer orientated society that slowly but surely takes away the chance these micro industries have on the market.

Here an image I took that is part of a 5 piece series about tuisnywerheid ladies in Pretoria.

The experience of talking to these ladies and their passion for what they do is absolutely wonderful. Some of them told me they specifically support older ladies who lost their husband in order for them to make a little extra money on the side. They talked about big supermarkets as their competition and how so many shops have vanished over the past years. But one thing I noticed in all the shops I visited... there is so much pride, pride of true home baked cakes and little tarts, of jams and pickles, of savory pies and traditional vetkoek and the personal relationships between the shop owners and the baking tannies. Just this I find makes it so important to not forget about them but to appreciate community driven little shops somewhere in the corner of a huge shopping centre who believe in real food, rather than mass produced... crap.

Mini Food

I enjoy food photography, but this I found online that just amazes me. The artists is Shay Aaron.

Afraid

In an earlier post, the one about the alternative processes, I was searching for a suitable topic or rather subject to photograph of which I would use the negative to print a cyanotype toned with strong tea. 

And I found it. Five solid and clean portraits showing people who just got a fright the moment the shutter triggered. It's a little tricky to execute, I thought of trowing the people with a ball. We will see. 

Not quite what I had in mind but still a very inspirational image.

 

Imagine the same style of photograph, contrast and lighting wise just with a different expression. 

To pull this into context, the metal pathway (very simplified) I walked to get to this idea was the following:

alternative processes - alternative people - portraits - blue - feeling blue - sadness - connecting images together as one - one emotion - creating one image consisting of different photographs - too complex - keep it plain - strong - clean - center shot - white background - portrait  and so forth...and then I realised while I just typed the last word (which was the word word) that I am still trying to develop concepts better for a complete picture. some things are missing still... but these sparks of light that you see when you close your eyes or stood up to quickly, equate them to little thoughts and ideas that submerge you in awesome creativeness and inspiration...will find me soon again.

When is time-over?

The question, what is time? can not be answered (I forgot, yes, the scientific world can of course...)... because everyone has a different answer... and anyone can disagree with the concept or understanding someone else has... but I think the one thing everyone agrees with is the feeling of having "lost" time... that feeling of fear and anger, or rather self-hatred or sometimes disappointment and sadness... that piercing stick which hits you in the stomach and folds you up like an umbrella.

I find it comes in many different forms, a few being that inner turmoil, namely purely forgetting things and having that "ohh sh.." moment but also realising after having done something that it was done wrong... or it did not work out the way you wanted it to. But why do we feel emotions leaning towards the not so positive side when noticing the loss of time? We should be happy for having at least done something with our time (for example being a living being in it)... some would say.

These thoughts, even though just incomplete little notions of firing neurons led me to a concept I would like to approach in photography, namely the combination of "negative" circumstances with "positive" emotions. It would be based on the same principles as body language... or rather how much you play with that phenomenon. What I mean is that if your verbal expressions don't coincide with your bodily gestures the person you are speaking to might feel a little confused about what you are talking about as we obviously consider both when interpreting communications. This concept is a very easy and basic idea of something that has to grow into something meaningful, and yes, again I refer to the development within my own thoughts, as always, but I guess today I just use it as an escape or rather excuse... as I find myself not inspired. But, I remind myself of the purpose of this blog, of using this platform as a guide to overcome these situations, and with time and effort they will return.

And as a little extra... this yummy liquid might help?!*

*Please understand that I don't encourage anyone to consume wine, including the one depicted below as it is an alcoholic beverage which can be harmful so some people.

Medium Format Photography

An assignment: Medium Format Photography.

And I love it! The colours, the aspect ratio, the detail... I could go on... It is by far the best medium I've used so far to capture images. Just testing it with a black and white Ilford and seeing the results... it opened a little door in my head to a new room... where the light bulb was already on. 

Here an example of a photograph I've taken with the test film which was scanned as a negative:

Isn't the detail incredible? And the contrast... I could go on!

I have realised by seeing the images I've taken with a medium format camera that this is possibly the only medium I know so far which would accurately represent the concepts I have in mind photographing, criticising or cherishing.... essentially sharing. I feel I have reached a breakthrough of epic proportions (isn't the word epic just epic?!) with regards to being inspired. This medium inspires me. And it feels like it won't be a temporary thing... but a choice I've made or rather a choice that happened.

...just a pity that thing is so bulky... *


*you do get smaller awesome medium formats but I don't have access to them yet.

Target: Art

Its time to write something thoughtful again... something that possibly could contribute to my understanding of what is happening... but to what? To this world? To me? To everything? To words that I throw in here that sound bold and all-encompassing? But I guess what I forget is the "you"? You as the reader... are you the one I write this too? I would hope this is not the case as this is my creative study... but I do... it is unavoidable!

What does this have to do with photography? It's all about concepts! Concepts, concepts concepts! And yes they are arty concepts... the ones by the people who stand in an art gallery or exhibition and have all those thoughts and interpretations of the piece on the wall, which, frankly, could be portraying anything or made out of any material you can think of.. but it is relevant? Maybe yes as it presents a concept possibly targeting a social issue or thought we all share and can relate to. Or maybe no... because it is in fact just art. Art doesn't do anything except make the people who create it feel even more confused about themselves and seem to enlighten the audience about what is happening around us or to them or in them. And now what? Nothing! I don't think people actually remember the piece they saw but rather the feeling, the emotion which they discovered through the piece. So this would essentially mean that art is good as it makes us more aware of things... but is it not a form of indoctrination as well? Just targeting more vulnerable issues? Like advertising, art advertises issues, reminds us of them and pulls them into our reality. And according to some followers of positive thinking this would mean these issues would become more or increase in intensity because we are reminded of them in a  problematic negative light and are not urged to think positively of solutions. Of course, this can also be seen as naive, faulty thinking... but it would make sense if it were to be true why things haven't gotten better yet... ok this last sentence can be ignored... it is too far fetched... but maybe thus useful for a concept in art?!

To conclude, peeling a plum and actually experiencing the texture of the flesh underneath and seeing the skin lying at the side loosing importance... as this texture is just so human like, a human without skin... just mixed with more sogginess... and the colour... it reminds me of cut open purple cabbage mixed with red berries... This violence of judging the inside, I do notice a resemblance to art?! Do you?

Alternative Processes

It's all about Photoshop! Have you seen this? Can you do that? Look what he/she did! The difference is amazing! How did you get there?

Instead of honoring this software even more, I will revert back to photographic printing and colouring processes that look fantastic. The key.... they require a little work, actions done by hand and chemicals, not PS.

A chemical is painted onto water colour paper. Then a negative or like in the examples below objects are placed onto the dried paper and then exposed to sunlight. The parts of the paper not covered change in colour. After exposing for about 5-20 minutes (depending on the process), the paper is washed with running water (sometimes with more chemicals added to the water), which acts as a fixer. The results are as below.
All examples from www.alternativephotography.com

Cyanotypes

Vandykes

Salt

Creating a fine art series with one of these processes shall be interesting. My thoughts are running wild while I'm trying to find a suitable topic that deserves this work and effort. Possibly a series on nudes in blue? Or dark brown portraits with dramatic lighting connected with each other in some or other way, or lastly photographing the theme of "to much of a good thing is a bad thing" but on salt, which would support the message inherently. I will have to get back to this.

An Invasion

Faces faces faces.... portraiture... it all seems to come together slowly... wanting to create faces that have more meaning... however that can be achieved...

I found these images of my drawings on my system this morning by coincidence and realised that my interest in portrait photography is deeper rooted than I first thought. And by looking at them I feel this little tingle in my tummy of wanting to shoot clean head shots of people with interesting lighting to really bring out their character and create a sense of "realness" and "being" when photographed. At the same time, by cutting off the rest of the body, the head, the brain, the machine is all that can speak...the one that needs to associate him/herself with him/herself once in that position. 

Taking one way glass with the mirror finish on the one side for people to see their reflection feeling unobserved and then photographing them from the other side of the glass might be the truest way to capture pure expression, but also it might show little nuances you don't want to see, that would destroy you, your perception of that person... it would bring to light the soul (for a lack of a better word), would question it and might even hurt it when exhibiting large prints of that person publicly.

I don't know if I would call it an ethical dilemma. But what would you call it? An invasion? But of what?

Sundays

Today, Sunday,  I stayed indoors the entire day, and it feels very strange... looking through the blinds and seeing the last sun rays hitting earth for this day... thinking back to these nostalgic times when everything seemed so promising, so free... but at the same time scary and challenging but in such a good way that it is never experienced the same way... for me driving at sunset triggers a little of nostalgia, but only sometimes... I wish I would find a recipe to feel that way when I want to... that sense of wonder and inner joyfulness. The most interesting thing about this whole concept though is that if you feel a sense of nostalgia, chances are that the person you're with at that moment feels it too. How strange?!

How amazing would it be if photographs can be taken that trigger nostalgia in people. Is it possible because you would need to be certain it would have that effect on most of your audience otherwise it's personal interpretation and sensation rather than universal... universal what?! I believe for today this is enough writing.

Social Commentary

Shooting a 2 minute video about social commentary is my next project. I have never really filmed anything before... this will be a challenge.

I find firstly a definition is adequate (this one here is from wikipedia): 

Social commentary is the act of using rhetorical means to provide commentary on issues in a society. This is often done with the idea of implementing or promoting change by informing the general populace about a given problem and appealing to people's sense of justice. Social commentary can be practiced through all forms of communication, from printed form, to conversations to computerized communication.

...after browsing around I found some inspirations:

"Some street artist in Germany reckoned that the new H&M posters featuring a very tanned model in a bikini was in need of some subtle social commentary so he spiced it up a little and added a Photoshop toolbar after complaints that the images look at tad touched up."

The above image is a little bit to "in your face" for my liking, even that it made me smile. But this might be an indication of what path to walk or what direction to choose.

The next thought of mine is why not try and talk about clothing.... "you are what you wear"... or are you? Exploring this issue via video seems tricky, but having close up shots of clothing pieces and fancy dressed ladies throwing their hair back... wearing scarfs with glitter and stuff... possibly having a timeline... starting with old, broken/torn clothing and ending with high end fashion... and finalising the video with a simple pair of scissors and thread on a table... everything, no matter what the end product is (in this context) starts with the same basic elements.  

To take it further, we are all humans, naked apes, and how do we allow ourselves to judge people on what they use to cover themselves up with... one would think that the more it glows or shines... the more the human wants to distract from what's underneath... or does he/she uses it to attract others... a cry for help, a cry to feel important, a statement of individualism... a way to survive in today's society....?

UPDATE:

I decided to use the concept above in a photographic series rather than in video format. Possibly even with the use of alternative printing processes.

Having experienced a power outage in the last couple of days (fair enough, it was only for an hour or so), I realised how dependent we are on electricity and how wasteful we use it. I found that by addressing more "obvious" topics with video was a better solution as my skill level in filming is essentially none. Video requires more energy/ battery life than photography and considering that filming is a rather continuous process similar to the stuff running through our cables, I found this theme appropriate for the medium. 

Below is the footage of my first - socially critical - video. (Filmed on the Canon 7D and edited in iMovie).

Conceptual Photography

Firstly, I'm going to showcase a couple of images that caught my eye:

By Alex Stoddard

By David Talley

By David Talley

By Geof Kern

...all of them... except possibly the last one are taken in nature... and most of them have the "fish" element featured in some or other way. These inspirations with their elements brought me onto my own mental path wanting to explore human personification of animals that are in danger...

I think if we as humans would be more careful how we treat or consume animals, or even having to put ourselves into their position, certain views would become clearer.

I am seeing humans caught underwater in a fishing net (with the fishing boat above) with no way out... possibly with forks and knives in their hands (unsuccessfully trying to use these tools to escape/ cut the ropes)... and a man closest to the lens in a suit holding the net like prison bars while looking into the camera, the camera being surrounded by other schools of fish so that the image looks like it was taken out of the perspective of a marine animal.

I think this can go somewhere... but I will need time to rethink and re-approach this concept, and possibly conceptual photography as a whole to make it mine.